Shouldn’t the kids come first?

September 2, 2019 | Questions

Q: My husband and I have three kids and I really love my husband, but, now that I’m a mom, shouldn’t the kids come first?

A: Oh, how wonderful that you and your husband have the children to enjoy. The answer to your question is no, but please hear me out. We learn in Isaiah 28:16 that the Lord referred to Jesus as the “cornerstone on which everything will be built.” Your relationship with God should come before anything else.

Second is taking care of you or “your personhood.” 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 says, “Don’t you know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, who you have received from God? You’re not your own. You were bought with a price. Therefore honor God with your body.” If your body houses the Holy Spirit, then you need to take care of it so that you can remain healthy to serve your mate or children and the other things that God has called you to. 

After your personhood should come your spouse. If it wasn’t for your relationship with him, the children would not exist. Ephesians 5 teaches us we are, in fact, honoring the Lord when we honor our spouse. The healthier your marriage is, the healthier your kids will grow up to be. Believe it or not, our kids get their confidence from being confident in mom and dad. Kids are very important, but, it is important for us to put them in proper perspective.

And finally, the layer you have been waiting for … the FOURTH layer of having Godly priorities in our lives should be our children. Children are a gift from God, and in 1 Timothy 5:8, we learn how important it is to take care of our families, but not before the Lord. You won’t have anything to give if you don’t take some time for yourself first. The Bible tells us to honor our spouses. They were there before the children arrived and they will be there after the kids move out.

Now, here are some ways you can work on the second layer: prioritizing yourself, because if you’re like every mother I know, this is a difficult thing to do. Make time today for a quiet time with God, good/healthy food, enough sleep, a little exercise, and anything else you do to relieve stress. It’s Biblical!

Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body. – 1 Corinthians 6:19-20